SLUBBERDEGULLION: n. A glorious seventeenth-century term of contempt (Found in Hudibras), apparently meaning a dirty wretched slob.
Sometimes I long for the good old days when children were fed in the scullery while the adults partook of their evening repast in peace and quiet. But in general, I treasure getting to eat meals with my children, if certain conventions are followed. We have four children. Three of them are boys, and the oldest is a girl, but one who received high praise from a boy who said, “She’s OK. She’s half-boy.” So trying to get through a meal without slurping, flying forks, impromptu jazz scat solos, and detailed accounts of a scene from The Incredibles is not easy.
In 2003, Hilary had reached the end of her tether. And so she worked with the kids to come up with a list of table manners that everyone could agree on. The result was a document simply called Table Manners but which I have christened The Slubberdegullion’s Guide To Table Manners.
You can view or download it here: The Slubberdegullion’s Guide To Table Manners (pdf, 34K)
If you don’t own a copy of The Superior Person’s Book Of Words or the three-volume The Superior Person’s Books of Words (Boxed Set) you are a nugatory mephitic fopdoodle who ought to be defenestrated. Find them here: Lingamish Amazon store.
Other Lingamish posts on parenting: Five rules for rowdy boys, Not Pastor and Professor but Mom and Dad
This sounds like something that the glorious Hyacinth Bucket would have on her shelves. “People who try to pretend they’re superior make it so much harder for those of us who really are!”
I’ve often thought that you quote from this book.
And I’m not sure what’s stranger: that you know about Hyacinth “Bookay” or that I do.
David, I just don’t know if I could keep all those rules…I don’t even know if my wife could!
This post is unnecessarily sesquipedalian
Defenestration. Really.
I think all these high-falutin words ought to be just thrown out the window.
O!, don’t mind me. I’m just a stink’n nobody, foolishly sitt’n
upside down, outside an open window.
LOL
The kids want to add another rule: “Daddy can’t talk about blogging at the dinner table.”
I don’t own this book, so naturally I have never quoted from it, but that might be changing fairly soon, my friend.
And I don’t just know Hyacinth; I’ve watched every episode of Keeping Up Appearances, and am able to quote from the show at will. It is truly a pity that I’ve got no access to broadcasts of the show in hac lacrimarum valle, but that’s what YouTube’s there for, right?